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Things it’s helpful to say to people who are anxious:

  • “Is there anything I can do to help?”
  • “I’m sorry you’re anxious right now.”
  • “Is it generalised anxiety, or is something more specific triggering it?”
  • “Try to take a few slow, deep breaths for me.”
  • “Can you…


everyone in harry potter treated luna like she was crazy for believing in weird shit like they didn’t go to wizard high school




i’m going to handle this stressful situation the best way i know how to

the way that i handle most things that are stressful

the way that is most productive and helpful

by crying

Crying relieves stress hormones

i think i’m doing crying wrong and that i’ve been doing crying wrong for a long time





television show idea:

men who relentlessly pursue people with inappropriate messages on ok cupid are forced to read everything they’ve said in front of a live studio audience.

i want a petition for this


slight modification: they have to read them to their mother


I was at the mall today and overheard this dude talking to two lesbian chicks. I hear him ask, “So which one of you is the guy in your relationship?” And the one girl looks into her pants and says, “It’s not me. How bout you? Are you hiding a dick in there?” Then her girlfriend looks in her pants and says, “Nope, I’m not.” Then the first chick looks at the dude and says, “Hmmm, guess that’s why we are lesbians.” And then I lost my shit.


I’m 91% pop and 91% punk, which makes me 182% pop-punk.

Turn Ons:
  • Intimacy. Hold my waist. Stroke my neck. Kiss my forehead. Hold my hand. 
  • Maturity. Patience is amazing. A prize will come to you when the time is right. Its called falling in love. Waiting is hard. But worth it. 
  • Honesty. I don’t care what you’ve done. I care about what you will do in the future. Be honest with me, I’ll be honest with you. 
  • Care. Because not many people give a crap about anything anymore.



Tips for being an adult:

  • there are none
  • don’t become an adult
  • stay a child forever
  • Peter Pan was right

abandon your son to stay young forever so he can be the dark lord